The Lighter Side - Article No. 5 - "Beam Me Up Scotty..."

As Seen in the July 2005 issue of   High Country Angler Magazine

 

When I started fly fishing pretty seriously a couple years ago I didn't know that much about fly fishing gear, so I did some research concerning the subject before I made my first major purchases. First I read a lot of product information about rods, reels, line, and leaders. I bought magazines, and used the Internet to research the major companies' web sites, getting information about what they sold. I especially tried to find equipment reviews by other fly fishermen who had already used similar equipment.

 

Within a short time I was thoroughly confused. Presentation, Rod Loading, Large Arbor, Small Arbor, Tip Flex, Fast Action, Slow Action, and what the heck did they mean by "… great setup for trout waters, but doesn't perform well on the flat"? Geez, I thought all water was flat, so I decided to go get some professional help. Now stop thinking that! I don't mean psychiatric help; it was professional fly fishing help that I went looking for.

 

Off I headed for the local fly fishing store. When I got there I proudly called upon all of my newfound knowledge and I explained to the salesman that I wanted, "A pole that will let me throw the fly all the way to the other side of the creek, but one that will let me …" (here I had to refer to the notes I'd brought with me) "… present the fly gently to the rising fish … , and I want a reel that will have …" (referring to notes again) "… a large arbor with minimum startup drag …". There, that wasn't so bad I thought to myself.

 

Well, I gotta tell you, that salesperson was looking at me like I had two heads. "It's a rod, not a pole …" he said through nearly clenched teeth, "… and let's assume that you're going to be fishing for trout in the local streams …" (with streams clearly annunciated so I'd know that he wasn't some hick from Oregon's Blue Mountains, like me, that referred to Blue Ribbon Trout Waters as a "creek"), "… and we won't need to be too careful about selecting a reel that's more suited for catching Giant Tarpon in Florida".

 

"Oh", was my brilliant comeback.

 

Then he started to explain to me what equipment he felt would work best.

 

As he talked my brain was spinning as all of that information gushed out at me. After a while I could see his lips moving, but I was so confused that it was just noise, pure nonsense. Kind of like listening to one of my teenage sons CDs. 3, 4, 5, 8, 9, 4-6, 100, 92, 5, 9, 4X, 18, 5X, these numbers seemed to flow out of the salesman's mouth as fast as the money would soon be draining from my checking account.

 

After I got home with the rod, reel, and line that "we" had picked out I set down to figure out what all of those numbers meant. With pieces of equipment, and empty boxes, spread out on the floor all around me, I started identifying them. As I did so I set each piece off to one side.

 

First was a 3 ounce, 4 piece, 5 weight, 8 foot, 9 inch rod. Next was my new 4-6 line weight rated reel, with 100 yards of Dacron backing, attached to 92 feet of weight forward floating 5 weight fly line, with 9 feet of 4X leader, which was attached to an 18 inch length of 5X Tippet. There I sat, holding a rod and reel that weighed less than the hamburger I'd had for lunch, but cost more than my first car. Man oh man I was thinking, what have I got myself into.

 

I could understand, mostly, where the numbers came from, but I was pretty sure I was going to need to go to engineering school to master the science behind how all of the gear was made. Boron, Graphite, memoryless metals, bar stock aluminum alloy, flex dynamics, aerodynamic stability, sink rates, arbor sizes, inertia. All of this newfound technical information was flowing past me so fast it felt like I was the hood ornament on the starship Enterprise.

 

After weeks of research and a day in the fly shop that reminded me way too much of my first week in boot camp, the results were a tiny little package and a big dent in my "fun money" fund. My mind turned to the next step, waders. Now that shouldn't be too much trouble to narrow down to a quick decision, I thought confidently.

 

Back to the internet, where I learned that you need to choose between neoprene and breathable material, zipped or not zipped, waist high or chest high, stocking foot or integral boots, leather boots or nylon, felt soles or studded soles, ………….

 

About that same time I figured out that I needed to buy polarized sunglasses. Bring on the color gradients, hardness ratings, lens curvature, optimum tint characteristics, hinge mean-time-between-failure calculations, and the all important frame width factor. And I'd always thought sunglasses were just supposed to make you look good.

 

My head was starting to spin again, and the only solution I could think of was to get some professional help. And I don't mean professional fly fishing help either.

 

Beam up Scotty… there's no sign of intelligence left in this fisherman's head!

 

 

Dennis Kreutz continues to research information about his next purchase, but has finally figured out that the least stressful source of fishing knowledge is gained on the water. You'll find him fishing streams (and a few creeks) throughout the Rocky Mountains this summer. For photos of fish caught on fly, and more information about equipment and fishing strategies, visit the extremeflyfishing.com web site or contact him at dennis@extremeflyfishing.com

 

 

 

 

Watch for upcoming Extreme Fly Fishing videos so you can

See It, Learn It, Do It, to the Extreme.

Materials and Photography on this Website are Copyright protected.  No reproduction or use of information herein is authorized except  with Extreme Fly Fishing, Inc. prior written permission.

Webmaster: dennis@extremeflyfishing.com